Friday, June 13, 2014

Saying and Doing Gap

Never had there been a case of waiting for Shukla shasti for months, to go to Kottakal in 2010 or 11. Thanks to my kanya being populated with heavy weights, and a wonderful absorption system, AVS Doc said, have fruits for dinner that too before 7 pm. Even before that, used to have mostly fruits for dinner. That was a time, when reasonably good food was available, for a reasonable duration. Now that food availability timings are shorter, quality is gone, am at Maslow’s base level hierarchy yet again. Cycles of life, wheels of destiny, ups and down. Will come out of this.

Yesterday was at sugarcane juice counter and next to me was a guy munching red coloured fried masala groundnuts. Was tempted so much, thank god, didn’t grab his groundnuts. So went to minus one department store, ate 150 gms of fried groundnuts, doing work in parallel, that tummy hurt a lot all night and morning. To top it all, had rotis, rice, khadi in spite of feeling full. Even roomies, when they offer me fried peanuts warn me, that I won’t be able to eat. Still greedily, would take a handful and return what was offered, after munching just one with tears in my eyes and running nose.

Yesterday night, made a sankalpa to stick to original decision and yesteryear's practice of eating only fruits for dinner. Guruji ordered - take Chitrak. Amazing this tiny little white flowered wildly growing stuff. Have been reading about its properties and dangerous side effects since morning. Come rainy reason, it would be growing wildly all over. God!!! Please help me get back to good old days of having fruits for dinner, let me not get tempted with food, that too food.

If we do something continuously for 21 days, it becomes a habit.
July 26th

Finally managed a 12 day phala kriccha vrat - lost 4 kgs in 12 days but starting on dwAdashi, gained 3 kgs in 2 days. ChaturmAs has just started and the first month itself has been a great teacher. Being a foodie, would sulk, if there was no sabji, that too cooked to my specifiications. Now have survived close to a month without vegetables, 12 days without rice. Now a simple curd rice, a simple dal rice is ambrosia. Next month, no curd, after that no milk products, last month no dicotyledons. It is been a huge learning experience.

panchAng says - ee masadalli eka bhukta, nakta vrat. No amount of fasting for figure can make me quit food. But with God's grace, in his name, everything is possible at last.

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